southern hospitality (orlando mega-con 2008!)

With your hosts: Jinnifer Barrentine, Jon Lewis, and Lee Bretschenider.



I'm drinking and doing an update, no doubt I've forgotten much of the sequence of events, so I'll just punch up the pictures with captions and really short stories because my memory is terrible and I am lazy. This update will only be in as much chronological order as follows:
before the con, the con and .... yep. That's it. Have a ball.

All in all, con was a blast and I think we did really well. The key to good salesmanship is a tag-team of hot nerds who have no issue with yelling at people/acting like a shameless idiot in order to get their attention. Just remember that kids. Here is a good example of all of our selling pitches smashed into one:

"You! Hey you! YEAH! YOU! You like the internet! WHO DOESN'T? You like comics? OF COURSE YOU DO!! You like things that are awesome?! YOU like things that are free AND awesome!? Well, pal, we've got all three! TWOMONOCLES.COM! Take some free shit! We love you! Look! We're funny! HAHAHA! And fun! And good looking! Come over here and talk to us!"

and let me tell you: it works like MAGIC.

ANyhow, ONWARD. HO!


I took an airplane. There were tvs on the backs of the seats. They had a big case of TEH FAIL, lol, Linux. When they got back to working, there was a touch-screen on-board in-flight trvia thing and I ANNIHILATED everyone else (#1, bitches! under the handle of "samus"). Heh.



The shittiest seat on the plane. I almost missed this one, too! I ran down 20 gates in Atlanta holding my suitcase in both arms. I was the last one on the plane and apparently very out of shape. Fucking unannounced gate changes. I didn't take a picture of it, and I should have because it was mega cute, but I was greeted at the gate by Jon, Lee and Brandon. Lee was holding a sign with my name on it that said "welcome to effing florida." Awwww!



They took me to an east-coast chain called "Steak and Shake" the irony here was that they did not, in fact, serve steaks. Brandon is here extrapolating on how mean Jon and Lee were to him in the 9th grade. It is funny. Lee cuts out magnets.


Jon and myself make a face.


Sleepytime! Super gay. Super cute.

The day after I arrive, we go to Universal studios FOR FREE, because Jon has tha hook up. There is a lot of technology involved in ticket taking--you are fingerprinted at the turnstile and the man is watching.


Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, best eaten on the krapper. Lee ingests Honey'O's; the best cereal EVER before our touristy adventure.

Off we go!



Jon and Lee.


Jon, Lee and Josh. They're like the girls who call each other before school to coordinate their outfits for the day. Nobody fucking told me it was green shirt day, I had to walk around like a tool in a white shirt.


Thumbs up, tool shed!


THE OLDEST MAN IN THE WORLD.

Here is something unrelated to the pictures: I am a big pussy and hate roller coasters with a terrifying passion. But I got brave and went on everything except Dr Doom. I ran the Hulk twice and on the 2nd go round, we "photo-opped" the picture on the way down. I bought a copy for 20 smackers and then left it on Jon's desk on accident like an idiot. We all gave the camera a thumbs up.


This was a really cool "ride" where they picked people out of the audience to "make a movie" that Christopher Walken was "directing" (and via the magic of modern technology was projected at many angles on the stage and interacted with the furniture and the live actor flawlessly and it was convincingly realistic.) They then shot everything, and edited it together for a trailer that they then showed you on the earthquake ride out. Lee screamed so much, he lost most of his voice for the rest of the week. But he did manage to impress some of the cougars on the ride who wanted to shake his pimp hand. Zing!




PALS.

Ok!
Now onto the the con! Here's all the boring krap that for some reason, I was REALLY impressed with...myself....with...:


My name in the book!


Jon's name in the book!


Our picture in the book!


Our name on the table!


Our backdrop! Painted by Jon's lovely GF, Morgan.


Ah, the first day before the doors open. Jon sets up.




The fearless leaders of tomorrow.


Hating life.


Buttons!


Free prints. These were (I imagine) supposed to last the whole 3 days, but, um...didn't. Limited edition exclusives! Every single one is gone now! You'll never have one!


More.

More.


Lee = Ballin'.


They thought the comic was funny and my hair looks good. Thank you, feminism!


Giggling uncontrollably at a picture of the Hulk.


People buying stuff.


Jon administering a Mad-Lib to a Chobits fangirl. She said "quirky", he wrote "corky". I can't stop laughing.


Anime girls laugh at the comic! Us:1, world:0. PWNED.


I make the dumbest faces ever, but they still pay.


Cute high school kids.


What goes on behind the booth : total glamour.




Man buys panda hat.


Leeford models his "I <3 Centaurs" shirt. BUY ONE!


Jon and I get interviewed for COMIC TIMING.




Then Lee! Who interviews way better, may I add. Download it! Listen to it! Our story is rad!


Now! For some sketches!


This guy was awesome! He wanted a stormtrooper humping a my little pony! I HAD to oblige!
He would later write to me via myspace that that very picture has made him a hit at the workplace and that he is officially a fan of TwoMonocles! Score!




My first sketch of the con. This kid came by all 3 days. He loved us! He was 14.


My new best friend.


He then brought his friend over to get a sketch, too. Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of him. That sort of thing is probably illegal in several states.


Another guy gets a sketch! A robot! Way funnier to read in person. But hey, he bought some postcards! I rule.


Hitler getting schooled by Wolfman. (You have to understand that I draw whatever they tell me too.)





Thank you for being so stoked! This poor Jedi was the worst picture I drew the whole time I was there (with the exception of the sniper from Team Fortress with Jon, no there is no proof this picture exists. Sorry kids.)



What $1 will buy you.


Lee + kitties = adorable!


Lee Bretschneider + Justin Peterson = Lost Comic hilarity. The only one in existence, drawn at the con, sold to a hot chick for $10.


HAHAHA, Hulk + Giant boner = comedy gold.


Yep.


And they do. You just wait till I draw all the stuff I wrote down to draw.


Spidey and Mary-Jane, via Lee.


Jon + Bruce. (not really, but still pretty hot.)


Harry Hipsters who were maybe just a little TOO serious about their craft.

(More awesome costume pics at Jon's blog!)


Jon and DR. GRANT. (isn't he so cute?!?)


Joker.




HOTTEST WONDER WOMAN EVAR. dag.


I can haz a quest, daddy? (I am drunnnkkk).



I KNOW I am missing some stuff.

Hm.

Maybe tomorrow.